The dogs of this neighborhood have their own newsgroup and communication network -- they use variations in uric acid instead of an alphabet.

This occurred to me while I was walking Beast, the oldest of my guard dogs. His access server, the neighborhood, isn't as automated as the Internet, so messages aren't all left in the same place. He has to travel from tree to bush, sniffing out the threads started by other dogs.

But he can always find those posts. He imbeds his snout into the grass or gravel and snorts and snuffles, and sometimes what he reads makes him pretty agitated. He adopts a "Who does this mutt think he is?" expression, lifts his leg, and posts his reply.

- Ivan Stang, sacred scribe for the Church of SubGenius.